Setting boundaries isn’t a bad thing if something positive comes out of it. You may think that friendships doesn’t require the same amount of effort you put into your relationships, but the truth is that no relationship sustains itself. And certain boundary helps you keep your bond healthy and intact.
Boundaries can be helpful for others to know how to best connect and interact with you. Especially in friendships where we share so much of ourselves and expect help from one another; however, though sometimes it’s doable, other times, it’s not. Hence, that’s where boundaries come into play – to avoid the feeling of being taken for granted. Wondering what type of boundaries you should have in friendship? Just scroll down:
How do you value each other’s time?
Often, we have far greater respect for business meetings with colleagues than we do for catch-ups with our buddies. But their time is valuable, too. Understand and value it as much as you value other things in life.
To what extent do you share your secrets with them?
You might have certain friends who know you in and out and others who don’t. While both these situations are perfectly fine. Just because they do not want to tell you something doesn’t make them any less of a friend and, as a friend, it is your job not to push them.
Not letting your emotional state rely on your friend’s emotional state.
To be able to empathize is a great quality but to get sucked in and to loose yourself in the process is a big NO-NO.
Giving each other ample space.
It’s essential to be aware of when to draw a line and as well as to be intentional about the mood you bring or take away when you’re with the people you care about.
To keep your own self-identity intact.
If you recognize that you are a people-pleaser, look within and see what the root cause is for your needing to please others at the expense of your own wants and desires.
It is inappropriate to tell them what they should do.
Although you might be their BFF’s but you still don’t get to call the shots in their lives. You could feel free to advice them on something you think they need help or guidance with, but don’t take control over their life and decisions. After all it is their life and they need to feel empowered to do it.
To respect your friend’s values and ask that they respect yours.
You may not share the same religion, ideas, or political views as your friend, and that’s OK. A healthy friendship allows two people to respectfully believe in very different things. It’s not your job to try and convince your friends to come over to your side, nor is it their job to convince you.
Givers need to set limits because takers never do.
While friendships do not need to be a 50/50 give-and-take every day, they should balance out over time, If you’re the one always giving, or feel emotionally drained after spending time with a friend, it’s worth looking at the friendship and determining how much value it is adding to your life.
To able to say ‘NO’
Friends need to be able to say ‘no’ to each other and respect the other’s boundary.